Monday, March 3, 2014

Sending Her Out into the World

Something I have been considering as we prepare for our relocation to Reno has been schools.  Obviously, having a child with disabilities creates a little bit more anxiety when we look at schools; how will the teachers respond to Evie?  How will the students respond?  How inclusive are the schools in Nevada? 

Then, I started getting bombarded with information about home-schooling.  I had always thought I COULDN'T home-school because Evie would lose the services that she needed like Braille and Orientation and Mobility.  However, I found out that here in WI, you can home-school your children with disabilities and the school district still will do an IEP for them (Individual Education Plan) as well as provide the services written into that plan.  Hmmmm....I started to think, 
"Maybe, just maybe..."
I also read a story written by a mother about home-schooling her daughter who was blind and had Cerebral Palsy.  I recall feeling the mother was brave, and innovative, and passionate about what she wanted for her daughter.  I thought, 
"I could do that..."
However, I then started to receive, in response to our announcement that we were going to move, the e-mails from teachers, therapists, and parents of Evie's school-mates.  I realized what a blessing Evie is to so many people.  I know she's cute, she's fun, she's always smiling at school.  I know she's inspiring.  But, I guess that actually feeling the sadness that these people expressed about "losing" their daily dose of "Evie"...that was very powerful to me.
Is it selfish of me to take that opportunity away from those who she would meet in Reno? 
I'm scared to put Evie out there. I'm scared to see her anxiety at attending a new school, meeting new people, learning new routes, and new curriculum.  I know we will have LOTS AND LOTS of tears.  I'm scared to find out that the world might not be as welcoming to Evie and her differences because they haven't known her for 6 years as her classmates have.  

But, do you see that word that just re-occurred over and over again in the previous paragraph?   
Scared.  Scared.  Scared.
Then God speaks to me through his word...
You are from God, little children, and have overcome them; because greater is He who is in you than he who is in the world. 1 John 4:4
What have I to fear?  God is so great inside of Evie; God is great inside of me and Jeff.  God is greater than anything in this world.  What have we to fear?

I'm not completely ruling out home-school.  I won't shut and lock that door.  But, I have come to realize that God is moving us to Reno for a reason, and part of that reason may be that there are people there who need a daily dose of Evie.  And, Evie will need a daily dose of them! 

So, I'll be "strong and courageous" just as God has commanded me to be, and I will send our little girl out into the world to show everyone her brave, beautiful, shining face

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