Emotion vs. Salvation~Why I Was Wrong...

A long period of time has passed since my last post. It seems I hardly got my blog off the ground before I allowed myself to be distracted by the world and all it's fancy things and I forgot what had impassioned me to start my blog to begin with!

Some recent events here in Madison, WI combined with the message I heard today at church reminded me why I wanted to blog. I wanted my blog to inspire others who might be facing difficult circumstances, I wanted it to encourage others, to build them up, to show them how wonderful a relationship with God can be.

Right now, though, there is a battle taking place in Wisconsin that makes me think only of civil war. It turns brother against sister, cousins against cousins, friends against friends. The battle is emotionally charged because it is based in politics and also based in one's ability to earn a living, to access healthcare, to plan for one's future. The battle is emotionally charged because it will directly impact our children and the generations to come here in Wisconsin.

I got caught up in the emotion of it all. I became hurt and offended by my conversations and exchanges with people who are friends and relatives. I took personally the remarks that they made regarding their rights as opposed to my rights. As anyone who feels like they're being attacked, I grew defensive and bitter.

Then, I get to church today and the message is about Children of God. Who are the Children of God? Who are the brothers and sisters of the Children of God?

Philippians 2:14-15 Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation in which you shine like stars in the universe.

Oh my...I realized right away, I had not been shining. The speaker pointed our that the reference to stars was based in that era of using the stars as guides for navigation at night. I'm supposed to be a shining star or others to see and follow as a guide. Oh my goodness...how many did I lead astray? Not just this week, but these past few months? How many people looked at me and thought: Wow! And she has a relationship with God??? I certainly don't want any part of that!

Then the speaker challenged me again! He asked us: Are you a citizen of Wisconsin? Or are you a citizen of Heaven? Well, certainly I would rather be a citizen of Heaven, not just Wisconsin. So, shouldn't my actions be those of a citizen of Heaven? Shouldn't I complain less about what I see going on in Wisconsin and focus more on what my citizenship in Heaven will be like?

Finally, he really drove home the reality of my many mis-steps...he said (as a quote that he couldn't place, and I could not find a source either) "Emotion is the shallowest waters of the soul, and we should spend time in the deepest waters of salvation."

Oh my...yes, I was wading in the shallow waters of emotion the past few months: What about me? Where is my glory? Where is my recognition? See me??? Here I am, dancing in the shallow waters of the beach!!! Look at me!!!

What I should have been doing, in order to continue to prepare myself for my citizenship in Heaven, I should have been diving in~exploring those depths of the waters of salvation...going deeper and deeper into the recesses~finding new worlds under the water rather that bronzing myself on the shore with no exploration, no new discoveries, nothing except my eyes closed tight against the sun...or were they closed to the son???

I was so wrong. I need to remember to be that shining star! I need to remember that my citizenship in Heaven is much more important that my citizenship here in Wisconsin. I need to remember that I should lift my cup of salvation and wash it clean from emotion so I will keep my eyes focused on the Lord and Master who washed the feet of fishermen and wore a crown of thorns...